Monthly Archives: November 2013
I suppose I‘m in the category of a IRAB (I read a book), or better yet, IRBs (I read books) in regards to much of my spiritual background. It however seems to hinder some of my spirituality when personal experience trumps literary sourcing and the logic part of me tries to either shut it down before it flowers or has me questioning whether the “thing” just how I want it to be versus how it actually is.
Over the years I have gotten a bit better from looking at only other sources and took the time to look at one of the most important sources of all of this: myself and my experiences. Now that’s not to say I completely turn my back on sources and go completely contradictory to what things actually are (ie the disk between Het-Hert’s horns being a lunar disk when clearly it’s the SUN according to evidence found everywhere else). I just find myself understanding Them in a different way.
If it works with me, it works with me. Since so much is up to interpretation, it seems nit-picky to deny experience outright (unless there are other unhealthy factors). I don’t have a problem with doing some things contrary to what other sources may say, but I find it troublesome when others expect my word to trump what else is out there. For example, for those who have been following what I do for a while would know I have a divination system I have currently put six almost seven years in to tweaking.
The most recent version included the ability for others to name and choose dice representations of different parts of their being for use with the divination tool. In order to gain these pieces the person wanting to hit that level is given a study guide based on my personal gnosis, so they understand and can join in the understanding of the interpretation.
There is one person who was at that point and when we talk I keep having to remind him, it’s my PERSONAL gnosis. The question I have: should I really be worried when I’m making no claim to absolute truth? I really am making a claim of personal gnosis. It does feel repetitive when I have to keep saying, “This is my interpretation, this is my interpretation”. Should I just let it be or do I need to keep reminding others about “hey, I do this Thing, which is a Thing everyone else may not do nor agree with”?
I don’t like being THAT person. The person who misinforms by their own ignorance and lack of foresight and pushes people down a way that really should not even be a thing (here’s a nod to you NeWiccanizers). At the same time, my whole work is to share what I know, because I know stuff.
It would really go against my MeryIb since one of His focuses is as a messenger and a keeper of knowledge. Now that’s not to say I mindlessly blabber all of the Things (or at least I hope I don’t). If I did blabber mindlessly I would hope someone would nail me upside a couple of times. Although I suppose I’m just prattling right now, but yeah, nit-picky thinky-thoughts needed out of the brain.
“U” is for unread Gnosis, because I have come to a point where it’s, “put the books down and do”.
It’s coming to be that time again. The time where snow falls from the sky and the area around me is saturated with bright colors, seasonal music (some places now start playing music before Thanksgiving in the USA – the record currently is November 1st at a Culvers in St Cloud, MN), and the time when uncaring people choose to be charitable to affirm to themselves and the world they’re not heartless.
Family, charity, compassion, and happiness are pillars I build and sustain as I walk along my current path. I used to be a bit conflicted with how to reconcile what I did in my new lifestyle with where I came from. There was a question as to whether I needed to stop what I had been doing (the gift-giving, the decorating, the listening to holiday music, etc) when I was really trying to figure out where I draw the lines between what I do and don’t do.
I have an interesting dynamic with this season. I grew up celebrating Christmas in many of its secular traditions (think New England Christmas minus church). Because of how ingrained the experience of the season is in my life, I won’t toss it aside even though my religious path has changed. The messages scattered within the season are messages I attempt to adhere to all year round. This time of the year just calls attention to all of the good tidings people have for others.
I have a similar perspective when it comes to wishing people “Happy Holidays” or “Merry Christmas”. I worked retail for enough years to have different experiences and dynamics during the wintry season. My conclusion: if someone said “Merry Christmas” to me, I said it back to them. If they didn’t say “Merry Christmas” I said “Happy Holidays” only if it was apparent they were buying gifts (through actions like conversation). Now do I specifically celebrate “Christmas”? Yes and no, it’s not my main focus, but it’s there, and I don’t feel I’m being erased when the greetings come in.
I actually take more offense when someone wishes me a “Happy Yule”, when they place me under the “Pagan” bubble. Just because I’m a polytheist doesn’t mean Yule has any meaning for me. That’s erasing my personal experience. I mean, I wouldn’t walk up to someone who I think is similar and say “Ankh, Uadj, Seneb!”, making the assumption they know what that means.
Basically it’s now welcome to either the bane of existence or to another enjoyable season. I prefer not to be “Bah Humbug” and roll with it all.
“U” is for unifying native culture and my chosen path, because the rituals I do in this season both in my path and fitting within my path are more apparent these next two months.